Engaging in Positive Self-Talk

I could have done better…I cheated on my diet…I know I shouldn’t but I did anyway…I hate my body’s shape…I’ll always be a failure…

The list goes on and on. We have all engaged in this type of negativity at one point or another. This negativity feeds into the cycle of bad feelings and can impede progress. This type of internal dialogue is known as “self-talk”, and negative self-talk at that. Self-talk is our internal voice that provides judgement on ourselves whether it’s good or bad and influences how we proceed through our day-to-day life. Sigmund Freud was the first to say that we have both conscious and unconscious thoughts going on in our minds. Research agrees without exception, that transforming negative self-talk into positive self-talk can have a huge affect on our behavior change. What I mean by behavior change is our ability to engage in new or different behaviors from our norm; ie. engaging in a new eating pattern or starting a new exercise routine.

Whether we’re aware of it or not, it can play a HUGE role in how we view ourselves and can take a powerful toll on our confidence if we only focus on the negatives. Think of the last time you did something less than ideal…what did your internal voice have to say about it? Probably something degrading, right? And how did that affect the way you proceeded with the rest of your day? Were you able to easily shrug it off or did you dwell on it? Now think of the last time you did something really good or productive…what did you internal voice sound like in that situation? Did you feel like you were on top of the world? Did you pat yourself on the back? Did you then move on with your day in a victorious pace? Self-talk can be a motivator or a paralyzer; it all depends on what your self-talk sounds like.

It’s time to challenge the negative self-talk. Tell your inner critic to put a sock in it! It’s time to use your self-talk to your advantage! When you sense the negativity coming on, take a moment to consider what the voice is saying…is it true? Is it exaggerated? Is there a more realistic thought you can replace it with? For example…thoughts like “I’ll always be a failure” can look more like “I choose to learn from my mistakes, they do not define who I am”.

Changing your self-talk is all about showing yourself more compassion and being more accepting of who you are. Engaging in more mindful self-talk is a part of self-care and treating yourself with more respect.

For more on self-talk, check out these websites:

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/basics/self-talk

https://positivepsychology.com/positive-self-talk/